Harinaam….an Ocean of Sweetness

Recently, at the beginning of Kartik Vrata, I heard Prabhupad Prem Gopal Goswami ji’s katha on a prayer, Sri Krsna-namashtakam, by Rupa Goswami. It triggered thoughts of my own life and I got curious about this prayer. I started reading this prayer daily wanting it to give me some instruction. Prayers spoken by saints and eternal associates of Lord Krishna are not ordinary mundane songs or poetry. They are transcendental creation expressing the inner moods of highly exalted spiritual personalities, saintly devotees. They are windows to the spiritual world. They convey the essence of the Vaishnava spiritual philosophy. Such devotional poetry is a portal to the realm of Bhakti, the realm of pure loving devotion to the Supreme Being, the divine couple, Sri Radha and Krishna (Sri Kirtanamritam).

The last verse of this prayer Sri Krsna-namashtakam is as follows

nārada-vīṇojjīvana! sudhormi-niryāsa-mādhurī-pūra!

tvaṁ kṛṣṇ a-nāma! kāmaṁ sphura me rasane rasena sadā (8)

O life of Nārada’s vīṇā, O You who are like waves of essential nectar in the ocean of sweetness! O Kṛṣṇa-nāma! Of Your own volition, please always manifest on my tongue (complete Bhajan here)

The devotee prays and begs to Sri Naam Prabhu to manifest on their tongue if He so chooses to do so and if He is pleased, as He is like a wave of nectar in the ocean of sweetness. Sri Naam is non different from Sri Krishna, but along with karunamayi (most merciful) Srimati Radharani, They are more merciful than ever. They can drown us in that ocean of sweetness if They are pleased with the our service.

We are told about Jive doya, be merciful to all living entities. What does it mean? Be merciful upon yourself ? Jive doya means on other living entities by giving them the gift of Harinaam,but for oneself all our acharyas have shown that no leniency would be shown with one self, as the mind is wicked and will always lead you astray. I once asked Prabhupad Prem Gopal Goswami Maharaj about concept of self love. His reply was that “self relishing in spiritual thoughts and practice is self love”. So just mundane repeating of “I love you “ in front of the mirror is not self love. Self love if one wants to be merciful to oneself then one should surrender immediately to a spiritual master and take spiritual initiation. That is true Jive doya.

I had a few realizations after reading the prayer for few days. Here are a few that I feel from the core of my heart.

I am an ocean of faults and Harinaam keeps uncovering that for me but I keep covering it up again and again by my enjoying tendencies. The humility is to feel it to the core, not by coming up with phrases trying to pacify oneself and saying ‘I love you’ to oneself. I loved ‘me’ that is why I am here in the material world in the first place. I didn’t want to love Krishna, so I am here. I left the abode of Radhe Shyam and I was dumped here in this material world. Trying to understand my own situation I can see that Radharani gave me a golden pot to hold the unlimited prema that Krishna naam gives , but my pot has unlimited holes. I need a new pot. I medicate with various things of this world as I can't handle the pain and suffering of this material world. It is actually our mind that creates this suffering. Prema is always coming just like everything we need is coming from our sweet Lord, but my golden pot has holes so I cannot collect the prema and I am unable to fix the holes. These holes are my vices of Kama(lust) Krodha(anger) lobha(greed) moha(attachment) mada(madness) and matsarya(envy). Furthermore these holes are my undeniable laziness, inattentiveness towards my sadhana(practices of devotion), misbehavior towards all jivas, and the hypocritical nature of kaliyug prevails in me. I cannot fix these holes and I beg to be given another body with a new pot. I took shelter on you, Oh Naam Prabhu when I was on the verge off being hanged by life, I never knew then that you the name and Krishna are non different. I never knew that you are more merciful than Krishna himself. I had reached the end of my rope when you threw me another rope of love. Just in time. You came then. I chanted for a long time with faith that you will come dance on my tongue, but due to pride in my heart you have not come. I chanted with disregard and inattentiveness many a times, thinking of other things but you. Its all dry chanting with no feelings of love. But still your overwhelming mercy is such which took us from being a worm in stool to the point of worshiping you in a deity form. Oh Sri Naam Prabhu, if you feel merciful towards this fallen soul then please come to me, dance on my tongue else this wicked tongue cannot be controlled.

I promise to chant with love and intention as if its my last breathe. You are Shyam and you are in every atom as Paramatma and you are in the core of my heart. In-spite of all the disrespectful ways, inattentive ways I have chanted you still allow me to do Harinaam time and time again. Please dance forever on my tongue till eternity and never leave me, never let a moment pass when you don’t occupy my conscious and subconscious moments. Regardless of which loka I end up on, never ever leave me .

All instructions are leading up to one instruction. Chant Harinaam !! Chant Harinaam !! Chant Harinaam !!

This week’s tunes